Kamala Harris Needs To Be Unburdened By How She's Been

If the Vice President wants to be President there are some things she needs to do differently.

President Biden has withdrawn from the race and has endorsed Kamala Harris. However, with all the uncertainty about how this will proceed, Vice President Harris becoming the nominee is not guaranteed. To her credit, Harris has stated that she intends to “earn and win” the nomination. Good, that is the attitude she must adopt. 

She will need to fight every step of the way and more, even after earning the nomination. First, she must convince the party, and then she must convince the country. To do so, she must change a number of things about how she presents herself publicly.  There are two or three things that are most important. Changing these will improve her chances of defeating the orange idiot. If she doesn’t, well, good luck Kamala.

Now, not that anyone asked, and I’m sure none of Harris’ people will read this, but on the off chance that throwing this out there might help, here’s what Ms. Harris must do:

First, let’s discuss your speaking skills. If your public speaking performances as Vice President are indicative of how you’ll present yourself as a presidential candidate, well, there’s no nice way to put this – you’re in trouble.

I assume that as Vice President, you’re in a challenging  position where your statements can’t be seen as contrary to the administration’s positions. You can’t risk anything being interpreted as offensive. You can’t say anything that may be deemed controversial. In essence you can’t really say anything at all, and so you are expected to engage in meaningless small talk.  And when you’re required to say things without really saying anything, you end up saying stuff like this, when you spoke at Howard University last April:

“I think it’s very important, as you have heard from so many incredible leaders, for us, at every moment in time, and certainly this one, to see the moment in time in which we exist and are present, and to be able to contextualize it, to understand where we exist in the history and in the moment, as it relates not only to the past but the future.”

Seriously, WTF?!?!?!

This is only one of many instances you stood before the microphone, or spoke directly to someone in an interview, and spewed out nothing but nonsense that was often times circular, and always devoid of meaning. And even if it has a hint of meaning, and I’m not sure this example does, it’s just odd and pretentious:

“… what can be…” (waives hand across) “ … unburdened by what has been.”

I’m sure whoever wrote that crap for you thinks it’s profound. It’s not. While this might play well in California, it does not resonate with the rest of the country. You’ve used this phrase countless times, and in each instance it did not play as well as you imagined it did.

You once said in an interview with The New York Times, “I find it off-putting to engage in platitudes.”  Well then, stop it. 

From now on, when you speak, do so clearly, concisely, and with purpose. You are no longer in the roll of supportive sidekick. Say what needs to be said and not what you think people want to hear. And for God’s sake, make sure your speeches are coherent.

While we’re on the subject of speaking, you’re no longer the Carol Merrill of the administration, so stop doing those stupid hand motions when you speak. 

Additionally, you need a lot of practice reading from a teleprompter.

The other thing you need to change is that exaggerated open-mouth laugh and the equally creepy wide-open mouth smile.

I’m not sure who the hell came up with the idea that female politicians need to laugh out loud all the time, let alone do so in an exaggerated manner. I’m sure some overpaid political consultant thought that laughing will make you relatable, will make people will feel close to you, that it will get people on your side. Sometimes that can be true, to a small degree, but only when it’s appropriate. Your laugh, however... well, if there were a laughter scale from 1 to 10, yours would rate at 38. It comes across as insincere and creepy, rather than endearing. It does not make you accessible; it’s off-putting, and it makes you look like an idiot. Think back. Remember Hillary Clinton’s laugh? Yeah, that’s you, only you’re worse, and it’s not a good look.

The overemphasized cackle, the giant open-mouth laugh and smile …

Knock. That. Shit. Off.

You can smile, just don’t look like a crazed caricature when you do it.   

I’ve heard you can be tough as nails, and that you exhibited it when you were the DA and then State Attorney General. If true, you need to get that attitude back. Remember when you grilled Kavanaugh? You were serious. You were tough. And you didn’t exhibit that stupid smile or laugh. Look, I’m not saying you need to be adversarial all the time, nor that you can’t have your lighter moments, just stop being the happy clown you’ve appeared to be up until now. America is not going to elect a happy clown who cackles and can’t speak coherently.  

I know there will be people who will say I’m being petty for pointing out these particular things, and that they are not important. Not true. Let’s be honest about the presidential election, it’s not solely about who will be the best president. If that were true Trump would not be the republican nominee. It’s largely a popularity contest, and appearance plays a big part in that. 

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